…You Don’t talk about Imposter Syndrome

Right?  Isn’t this how we all think about it?  We keep it to ourselves, because if we mention it to anyone, either they’ll tell us it’s not true, but we won’t believe them, orrrrr, they’ll agree with us that we are a fraud and it will crush us.  So no way in Hell will we ever mention it.

However, that is the worst thing to do.  Talking about it to others we trust and have a good connection with is what we should do.  Even if we don’t believe it, by talking about our feelings of being an imposter will help to get it out of our head.  And letting those that care about us know, can help them understand where we are coming from.

We may not believe what they tell us, but given time, we may start to believe just a little.  Or if nothing else, the feelings of imposter syndrome will be lessened because of the support we have from others.

But again, this isn’t easy.  Why?  Because we hide our imposter syndrome so well, no one would believe us. Instead of listening and wanting to understand us, we feel they would just doubt us, throw some positive words at us and that would be it.  That won’t be helpful.  Or as I stated above they will agree with us and then we’ll be crushed and won’t know how to go from there.  Again, not the most helpful.  

Yet, we really do need to talk to someone.  And to have them truly pause, and listen and understand us.  To know how devastating this can be for us.  And to walk with us through this.  But it still not easy.  And won’t be.

Think about the people in your life you feel you can truly talk with.  Not talk to, or talk at, but talk with.  That person who will listen and truly hear you and understand.  Not someone who will listen just to throw a response at you.  These are the people (even if its just one) you want to have a conversation with.  To have them understand You, and to help support you and help you see the real you for you.  

This will take time.  It will not be easy nor quick.  

You need to let them know why you feel as you do.  What your fears are and that you do not want to feel this way anymore.   And ask them, for their help through this.  Let them know what they can do to help support you. 

Remember it has to come from you so that it has the most positive effect for improvement for you. 

Are you looking for that person to listen?  Or want to develop strategies to move you forward away from your imposter syndrome?  And to build the confidence to tell others in your life?  Contact me and we’ll talk and we can work together to get you where you want to be. 

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